Sometimes it takes balls to be a woman

Well, that’s it. All done. 6 weeks of sweat, “F**k my life” glances thrown in Ella’s direction and moments of unconsciousness has come to an end. It’s come just in time as I’m moving away next week but I couldn’t be more upset; I have absolutely loved it and am going to miss it massively. The outcome is visible, I’ve lost 14.5 inches and gone down a dress size, but the impact it’s had on my general aura are more substantial I feel. I’ve had a rough couple of months but instead of moping around on the pity train I’ve powered through with a disgusting amount of burpees. I feel bouncier, less stressed and my smile rate has shot through the roof - vibes on fleek. Weight wise, I don’t tend to carry extra weight in a particular area i.e stomach, thighs, I always just feel like I’m carrying an unwanted layer, generally hefty. Thanks to the copious amount of thrusters, burpees and explosive star jumps though, I feel like I’ve shed that layer, as if I’m in a vacuum bag and my body has been sucked up. I'm a lot lighter on my feet, duh, but you know what I mean, and feel, well, bonnie!

.... but squats will make me a badass

From a health point of view, my fitness levels have increased by an overall 40.6%; on one exercise in particular, push ups, I more than doubled the amount I could do when I started! Ella says she has noticed the most significant difference in my upper body, apparently my arms are more defined and I’m generally a lot stronger which is great! I should bloody well hope so though considering the amount of burpee/belly-flopping seal movements I have endured! 

Suicides!

There have definitely been moments where I have considered violence upon Ella, like the time she grinned whilst telling me to get ready for “Burpee Hell” or when she says “nearly there” knowing full well she only means to the end of this set, not the bloody session. The obvious truth is that you need to be pushed, need to challenge what your body can do, and that is exactly what Ella has done 3 times a week for the past 6 weeks for me. It’s such an awesome feeling to skip out of that warehouse unit having just completed something you thought you had no chance of doing, I guess that feeling is pride. Shock and pure disbelief, but also pride. 

There’s only been one session I was cba to go to and that was just because I was tired and it was an early one, but everything changes as soon as you walk in, you get your game face on, kick some ass and walk out a sassy little theng! 

It’s been fantastic; pure therapy for the mind, body and soul and I can’t thank Ella enough. The perfect rehab for a chubby, but “jolly”, 25 year old cheese-aholic. Not only have I lost weight, tightened up and re-found my happy, I’ve also gained a friend. A lot of conversations and epiphanies were had in-between fat pounding and major exhales; the best medicine for a rough chapter is exercise and a good friend. Amen to that, now where’s that 6 week old bottle of Prosecco!

Feeling Bouncy!

You see sweat? I see a sexy glow ;)

Week, let’s call it “Four to Five-ALIVE!”

Okay so the upward rollercoaster that is week 1 - 3 of my PT programme hit a glitch. Not a detrimental track malfunction, but a hiccup let’s say. Results were good, energy was good, mindset was great! But then I found myself in a bit of a pickle, no excuse for not eating healthily, but the emotion-inducing discovery I made affected my positivity slightly. True or false, this information can only benefit me in the long run so I was in The Unit sweating it out an hour later. The challenging news has seen me power through circuits, “get it done’s” and, what I like to call, “A partridge in a pear tree” sessions. That one was a toughie! Here’s my explanation: 12 reps of an exercise (for me it was “Get Ups” - killers!), 11 reps of another exercise, then back to 12 reps of the exercise, 11 again and then 10 reps of different exercise, and so on and so on. Each circuit takes a little longer as you are adding on another exercise; my God it’s about mind games because, consequently, each one is harder and more tiring!

So this week I had a few days off as I was away in Lisbon with some friends; it was wonderful and we had a great time. It’s a lovely city with beautiful scenery, cultural attractions and of course, incredible food. I’m not going to lie, I ate and drank more than my weekly plan allows. Hands down way more treats than a normal week, but I did’t go crazy. It was more alcoholic treats than foodie treats; I didn’t have desserts, ice creams in the afternoon or lavish breakfasts but we did embrace the tapas (it’d be rude not to surely?) Good news is I’m straight back on that healthy band wagon, let’s not rush to the scales though ey. 

We hear it all the time, exercise is the best medicine for stress, anger, sadness, etc. Obviously it’s true, but it’s never felt more appropriate for myself than working through this Personal Training Programme. The trick is, because you’ve made an appointment, booked one of their slots, you can’t just not turn up. If I relied on encouraging myself to get my fat ass to the gym I could chose to not go, stay at home, “treat myself” to a tasty dinner. Feeling unmotivated more often than not leads you to make the wrong choice, the unhealthy option whereas in actual fact, the best thing for your self-esteem and well-being is to sweat. I can honestly say I walk out of that building euphoric; the days I’m already on cloud 9 are enhanced and the days I feel like crying the tears are zapped away, they seep through my sweat! It is by the far the best investment I have ever made. I’ve paid a fifth of what I paid for my Mac and yet all Apple does for me is make me feel thick as a brick for not knowing how to use the bloody mouse pad! 

Feeling good about yourself and feeling confident radiates from you, it’s noticeable to others and when you give off such an energy good things happen. Whether it’s within your career, social life or relationships, inner wealth is by far more valuable, to me anyway, than monetary wealth.  

You Want Me To Smile? During "Burpee Hell"?

Week 3! 

Unfortunately there was a fire in Bude Industrial Estate this week, no one was hurt thankfully but it meant The Unit was closed for 2 days to be aired and made safe to return. Consequently my Monday morning session was cancelled, gutted! I love my sessions, they make me feel on top of the world so I missed it terribly. When it came to Wednesday I was slightly apprehensive about how much this workout would hurt seeing as I’d had a considerable rest period of 5 days…….. I arrived, successfully psyched up for a bashing, to be told to consider my thoughts when Ella told me today was going to be, what she called, “Burpee Hell”… She actually called it that, out loud, in front out me! With my "F*ck My Life" face in full force, I then had to go and warm up with my 10 laps; “just keep running Ellie, run away Ellie, just don’t go back”. Self-pity over with, I flicked the attitude switch and told myself to “woman up, go smash it!”. And I did #smugface 150 Burpees TICK 15 laps TICK Abs-insanity TICK Beetroot face TICK Go me. I knew she’d beast me and I’m so glad she did - thanks Ella!

Ow God here goes!

My next session wasn’t quite as euphoric, however. It was a combination of boxing, isolation exercises and running and my God did it hurt. It hurt there and then, it hurt straight afterwards, it still hurts now. For some reason I found myself frustrated throughout the entire workout and I think it was frustration aimed at myself. The exercises I was doing were all the ones I hate, I struggle with and feel I don’t do properly, but instead of focusing that frustration on the boxing bag it resigned in my head. I hate not doing things properly and feeling like I’m not doing them to my best ability. Don’t get my wrong I gave it my all and was shattered, but my technique was infuriating! Ella says I shouldn’t be so hard on myself and that I won’t enjoy or be great at every session, I guess she’s right; we’re going to re-do the workout in a few weeks though, see if I improve - I better do….

I did it!

Food Glorious Food!

The #smugface glow all clients radiate whilst leaving The Unit lasts, for me, generally the entire day, so when I popped into town after one of my sessions to get some life-admin done, I probably looked like one of those people I used to see and think “ow bugger off with your yoga pants, scruffy pony and endorphins, stupid healthy human”. Those endorphins do not act as a guilt free bubble though, that pasty waft still draws me in, making me cry a little inside, and the fact I was so tired I threw/flopped my debit card at the contactless machine hoping it would connect correctly definitely amounts to substantial effort being placed from my part to stay on track. Sorry Mr Spencer Thorn Man, I did apologise profusely through exhales. 

Good news! Organisation and staying prepared with meal times, eating away from home e.t.c is becoming somewhat of a routine and therefore easier. Bad news! Sticking to the level of strictness I previously executed, not so easy. I keep hearing somebody say “it’s okay, it’s just a little bit” or “it’s only one, what difference does that actually make?” Turns out it makes quite a difference when those voices then disappear in place of “Oh hey Mr Third-Takeaway-Of-The-Week! I’ve been waiting for you, for approximately 1 and a half days, we mustn’t wait so long next time!” Moderation my friends is the key, but mentality is the locksmith. Keep that inner fatty in check. 

Oo, also, you may not recognise me anymore as I’m so skinny. I’ve lost another 2lbs and 3.25 inches! So 4 lbs and 6 inches in total! I can’t necessarily see it, but I definitely do feel it; I feel bouncier, tighter and less lardy :) Thank you very much Miss Summers <3

#stepbystep

#fitness

#healthyliving

#motivation

#burpeehell

My Legs Are Hungover...

Ellava-Painful!

It's Week 2!

My first session this week was on Monday; what a way to start your week. I think my body’s getting used to this idea of exercise or my mind is blocking out the pain, either way I arrived to another circuit style training session called Tabata aching slightly less! This time, instead of completing rounds, you perform 1 exercise 6 times, 20 seconds at a time with a 10 second rest in between. “Jesus”, I thought, how am I going to do that when I passed out just doing them 3 times? Turns out I like this one! You focus your energy on that one exercise, go as hard as you can, GOL like hell then you don’t have to do it again! You end up really working that particular set of muscles then you move onto the next. One exercise in particular meant that I was carrying a 5kg medicine ball whilst sprinting as fast as I could, I quite enjoyed it! It’s nice to do something different, something I would never think of, or have the equipment to do by myself at home. It also makes a change to be exercising, gym-style, outside. I would hate to have videoed myself doing this; lycra leggings, heavy balls and manic thumping create only an image unconditional love could appreciate, but it was fun and I was out of breath so cheers to that!

For my second session of the week I was going to be doing what Ella called, 10 to 1; you do 10 repetitions of one exercise, then 1 of the other. You then do 9 repetitions of the exercise, and 2 of the other, and so on and so on. Sounds fairly simple right? It’s actually pretty awesome because you start to ache in one area and then as the reps go down on that exercise and up on the other, the ache shifts to the other area of the body! We did multiple combinations of this one so ending up with a full body workout.  

My last session of the week was my favourite merely because I felt proud of how hard I worked. I’m calling this workout “Isolation Station”. For this one we’d focus on one area of the body i.e legs, do a mini circuit for 10 minutes then change the area of focus to another area of the body i.e arms. It’s a killer! Ella loves the way I build up to an exercise because I say “okay” as if I’m psyching myself up to go get em! I don’t think I’ve “okay-ed” myself as much as I did during this workout. The cardio section was by far the worst, you got it, Burpees. I, like everyone else I’m sure, despise burpees. Yes they’re hard but I think the fact that I resemble a sea lion out of water is the part I dislike the most. I did it though and my God I felt fantastic afterwards!

For the love of food!

As I said previously, I spent a couple of days in Bristol this week and was saving my treats for eating out with friends. As it happens, I didn’t end up indulging much at all, the only thing I did have was a chicken, falafel, hummus and salad wrap which was rather large but not necessarily unhealthy. I still met with my friends but chose to meet for a coffee instead of a meal time - I even resisted the urge to inhale a banoffee brownie! 

I always believed being in a relationship meant it was easy to get chubby because you eat out, cosy up on the sofa with a takeaway and relax a little with your weight watching. Again, it’s all about mentality. If you let yourself get comfortable you’ll obviously put on weight, but if you make the effort to consider treats as treats, and keep yourself in check you shouldn’t struggle. Sometimes people focus too much on what they can get out of a relationship rather than what is already good about it, they don’t take the time to appreciate what they have in front of them, instead they constantly look at what’s next, what needs improving. Maybe we, and I include myself, should chose to put the time and money normally spent on food, into investing in our relationships, i.e don’t get a takeaway but buy ingredients to cook a dinner together, don’t go out to dinner, take dinner out to the park, save the money and put it toward a weekend away! Too many of us live to eat rather than eat to live; how many more experiences/Bucket List ticks could we achieve if we cut down our food budget? Obviously I don’t speak for everyone, maybe not even anyone other than myself, but I am going to make a conscious effort from now on to invest my energy and money into more fruitful aspects of my life. 

I live and breathe social situations; I love seeing people, meeting new people and generally having fun, so I’m determined not to let healthy eating stop me. However, it is difficult. Perhaps if I wasn’t working the hours I am it would be easier; split shifts, working until 2:00am and living 10 miles away from work, all mean I have to prepare my food sometimes days in advance, constantly carrying multiple packed lunch boxes with me. I think I’ve done really well so far, but on Saturday I did decide to use one of my treats as a meal out. I had 4 hours in between shifts so I used it to spend some time with the boys and grab some food (I had gammon, egg and chips - but I didn’t eat all of the chips Ella!). Obviously I wasn’t drinking but it was great fun watching them turn into giggling messes! (shoutout to BDK Kensit and Janbury). Also, I don’t know whether this is complete bullsh*t but I had’t had lunch so does combining lunch and dinner into 1 meal out even count as being naughty? I’m going to say no. Ella what do you think? 

So I’ve excused myself from that but I’m not sure I can to what happened after work. We 

had a wicked live Skar band in, we danced from the start of the shift to the end, it was 

awesome! We were all having such a good night we decided to pop to the club after work - 

why not? A bottle of beer, shot of sambucca and 3 (maybe 4) voddie sodas later and I’ve 

well a truly smashed through my treats limit. I basically danced solidly for 7 hours though so 

we’re good right Ella? The Sunday roast I was forced into having the next day was just a 

way to get my 5 a day in. Bugger. I’ve just realised Cauliflower cheese has cheese in it. 

Crap, that’s my cheese limit spent too. If nothing else I had a great weekend!!

Other than my night/day of weakness, I’m fortunate to have found myself very busy this last week, (I’m currently working 2 jobs, plus writing) so phantom-boredom-snacking hasn’t been an issue. However, there was one night I happened to be at home for the evening, it was a toughie. I ended up brushing my teeth at 8:00pm and vacating the kitchen where all temptation could be avoided, an early night was definitely on the cards. It’s a nice feeling to actually wake up hungry and ready for breakfast though!

Hmmm....

I’ve come to the conclusion that I am the problem. This is obvious, but I mean for a specific reason. I’ve realised that the reason I eat out so much is because I suggest eating out so much. Every time I see a friend I encourage meeting for lunch, dinner, ice cream, whatever it is! Since I’ve been limiting indulgences, I’ve noticed that the opportunity to scoff an Indian, burger or fish & chips has been less apparent and it’s because no-one else ever suggests it! Bloody fool. I wonder how much money I’ll save?

So an interesting week! Incredible work-outs, a bit of naughtiness and I lost 2 lbs and 2.75 inches! More importantly I’m not miserably hungry or dreading each session, they're the highlight of my day :) 

This is me trying to stretch my quad, no pain no gain huh?

#fitness

#healthlylifestyle

#theunit 

#nopainnogain

So This Is Why Skinny People Are Skinny!

Okay, so it’s been a week and I have to say, I’m feeling pretty good! I’ve had my first 2 sessions with Ella, both of which were different, both of which hurt. I’m particularly happy, more so shocked, with the food side of things as I haven’t let myself down once! Here’s a little about week 1!

Ella-Force/Ellanator/Ellatron/Ella-Summer-Bod/Ella "Summers Coming"!

So the day had come, the day to kick my wobbly ass into shape. Yay. 

Today, I was told, was an intro session whereby we would discuss my diet, downfalls, body hang ups etc and then finish with the fitness test. When asked “will I sweat today?”, Ella answered simply “yes” with a smirk on her face. 

It turns out, I eat too much cheese, drink too much cider and eating out is my favourite hobby. We discussed my thigh-like arms, and the pouch where my abs are hiding. For the fitness test I had to do 10 lengths of the road to warm up, then 1 minute of 8 specific exercises and I was confident, I told myself it was only a minute. A minute, however, is a bloody long time when your things are on fire and your butt is potentially being stabbed! I was a mess. A couple of exercises I did fine, but the rest, wow my Mother would have disowned me. I was like a beached whale flailing around, GOL (Groaning Out Loud) and pulling faces. Ella, ever the professional, assured me I was doing well and had a strong core, but when you're breathing as heavily as I was, it was slightly difficult to hear such encouragement. 

I felt it instantly, this was going to hurt for a good few days, how on earth would I be able to workout again on Friday?!?! My arms and legs were jelly, shaking whilst pouring a pint at work and bending down hurt so much I had to use the disabled toilets so I could use the hand rail. Hovering was out of the question. “Grin and Bear It” was my life for the next 2 days, a bit more like “Grimace and Bear It” though. 

Friday came along and I was ready, I had successfully psyched myself up for a physical beating. For my first full session I would be doing circuit training, something I hadn’t actually done before and was in fact one of the activities on my “Flirty Thirty Under 30” List (http://ellie-dawn.blogspot.co.uk/2016/08/flirty-thirty-under-30.html). 

My God it was tough, Ella had chosen exercises that I wouldn’t have normally done (generally because they hurt and I don’t like them), so it was a real test for me. I think a lot of the time it’s more about your mentality than anything; your brain is the muscle that tells you do to another round not the one in your bum/leg/arm. With circuits especially it’s a mental battle because you know you’ve got 1, 2, however many more rounds, to go. That’s why, for me, it’s so important to have someone there to push me, I would stop at 2 rounds because “that’s still good” if I was on my own, but having someone tell you what to do works wonders for your attitude and boundaries. 

This is slightly embarrassing, but, when I’d walked off my heart rate and was stretching out, I felt a bit strange, light headed lets say, and before I knew it, I was upside down, legs in the air, lying in the recovery position with a banana to hand. I have never felt sick or dizzy from exercise before, so it just shows how much harder you work and how much further you push yourself when you have a Personal Trainer; I’m kind of proud #smugface #beetrootface

Fun with Food……?

Before I started the programme, I generally ate what I fancied, I didn’t hold back because I thought, although not skinny, I was fine. It wasn’t until I realised I needed to lose 22 pounds, (yes, 22 bloody pounds), in order to be at my goal weight I understood my weight situation. Maybe I’ve got Body Dysmorphia….. 

So, I’ve taken on board everything Ella told me in my intro session, and taken my new lifestyle rules seriously. I know it’s only Day 6, but I’m really pleased with myself! I haven’t had cheese, alcohol or eaten out once and I haven’t had any treats. I was saving a cookie dough KitKat Chunky, that I’d been recommended, for my after work drive home on Saturday night but when it came to it I didn’t feel like I needed it. I think when you start to put some thought into what you’re eating as a whole, you really start to weigh up the pros and cons of eating naughty bits. It becomes a, “Do I NEED that chocolate bar?” rather than a “I really WANT that chocolate bar”. I knew I was going to Bristol in a few days time and that I’d be meeting friends which would probably end up being lunches or dinners out, so I weighed up the importance of each and chose eating out with a friend to be more worthy. I guess this is why slim people are slim, they actually see treats as treats not everyday yummies. So far, I think the reason I’ve not been struggling too much is because I’ve been organised, I've prepared my meals and healthy snacks in advance, that way they’re still tasty, healthy and convenient for the day ahead ;) 

My most testing moment so far has been the making of a cheese sandwich for my Mum. I love you Mum but why on earth did you have to chose cheese.

I contemplated putting on rubber gloves to stop myself nibbling at the gratings, instead I physically gritted my teeth and chanted “don’t do it, don’t do it” in my head. It worked and I came out of the Battle of Cheddar victorious, until next time that is. 

So there it is! Week 1 done and dusted! Feeling good, feeling grated cheese, I mean great! I’m loving the fitness side and embracing the diet lifestyle, this is going to end well, I can feel it in my ever shrinking stomach ;)

#operationbuffbod

#personaltraining 

#lifestyle

Ow God, Here Goes!

Greetings from a chubby, but “jolly”, 25 year old cheese-a-holic! This is officially Week 1 of “Skinny Me”, (for the eighth time this year). This time is different, however. I have signed up, and may or may not have been drunk at the time on Bank Holiday weekend, to be personally trained for a 6 week programme, by a friend of mine, Ella Summers, at The Unit, Bude, Cornwall (https://www.facebook.com/The-UNIT-389273687942699/?fref=ts).

Now, I’m generally an active person, I like to force myself to exercise, I love being outdoors, I’m always the friend that wants to meet up and go for a run or walk the dogs instead of getting cake and coffee, but I have never done anything like this! I’m a typical Instagram and Pinterest user whereby I follow and pin all these amazing fitness gurus and profiles conning myself into believing I will now become one myself, copy them religiously and morph into a fitness inspiration. Have I stuck to one of their fitness plans for more than a week? Well yes, but did I do that whilst eating healthily and restricting my goodies intake, hell no. Result = not a lot. 

So, my thinking, albeit slightly hazey at the time, makes sense; I will commit myself to 6 weeks of a wake-up call - 3 tailored workouts a week with Ella where I’ll not only be watched but pushed, an eating plan (I don’t want to call it a Diet Plan - ugh bore) that will force me to actually think about what I’m shoving in my mouth and I’ll be writing about it to keep me accountable. This new blog will not simply focus on how wonderful and fabulous I feel at the end of the programme and how much of a new vegan, dairy-free, gluten-free, sober individual I will become though (there’s no way I’ll be giving up meat, cheese, bread or Gin), I want to concentrate on the actuality of losing weight, exercising and adjusting your lifestyle. I will talk about the emotions I go through, the cba moments (of which I’m sure there will be many) and the slip-ups. From an outside perspective it seems that people just “get skinny” all of a sudden but that’s just not the case. It’s a long and sweaty journey, they’ve really had to work for it and sacrifice a lot of their usual comforts to hit their goals, not everyone can do it. Let’s see if I can! 

What is my goal/plan?

I’ve never been an avid weigher, I don’t trust them, women fluctuate anyway and what’s the point? You don’t have a flashing light for everyone to see how teddy you are. I tend to go more on how I feel when I put on an outfit; that’s an actual, real-life measurement I believe. But the for the purposes of the programme, it will hopefully be good to see the difference over a long period of time.

My end goal is to be 9 and a half stone but I’m obviously not looking to achieve that in just 6 weeks - that’s 22 pounds! I also feel it’s perhaps not healthy to look at such a long-distant goal because you might not see the achievement in the little losses (wins), so I will be focusing on step by step losses in weight and measurements but also my Mirror Milestones. These are the moments you look in the mirror in your undies and a smile can’t help but creep up on your face for whatever reason that may be, whether it’s less back fat, a more pronounced bum shelf, whatever it is for you.

What am I eating?

Before:

Anything going really! I always have a healthy breakfast but I generally eat what I fancy throughout the day, not excessively but if I want a pasty I’ll have one, if I want to go out to lunch and have cheesy chips I will. You get my drift. I heart takeaways and eating out so, on average, I will have either 2/3 times a week (including lunches out), any excuse to combine seeing a friend with yummy food and I’m in. 

Ella wanted me to tell her where I thought my downfalls were food-wise, this is what I came up with:

• Cheese
• Portion size
• Eating out
• Picking throughout the day
• Alcohol
• Goodies after dinner

From now on:

Although she’s sent me tons of recipes to try, I haven’t got a strict food schedule which I really appreciate. Instead I’ve got 6 rules I need to abide to see the best results. Meals will come down to common sense.

1. Stick to 3 meals a day, maximum 2 healthy snacks
2. 2 treats per week - a treat is ONE alcoholic drink, a pasty, having lunch out e.t.c. I’ll be using my initiative on this one
3. Make sure I have my 5 a day: 3 veg and 2 fruit
4. Have cheese only twice a week - :( 
5. Go for a run once a week (only a couple of miles or so)
6. No added sugar in my coffee - this should be easy

What exercise do I do?

Before:

I haven’t done anything on purpose since before I left for America

From now on:

I’m doing 3, one hour sessions with Ella a week and then my 1 run a week

I'm generally really excited, I can't wait to get started, feel healthier, tighten up and embrace the ache. I know it's going to hurt, and I know it'll be a challenge to fit in 3 sessions whilst juggling the 2 jobs, writing and visits to Bristol but I'm keen for it! Let's be better Ford!

I'll be writing weekly on how the sessions go, how I feel before and after, how the eating is going, anything and everything that is relevant to the changes I am seeing throughout the programme. See you next week, wish me luck!